Listening

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness." (1Timothy 3.16).
I was recently asked by a friend how I can know when God is speaking to us. This was my answer:
"How do we know God is speaking to us or just our minds playing tricks on us?" This is difficult sometimes.
1. God speaks to us most clearly in God's Word, the Bible, and in the Bible most clearly in Jesus' words. If we stay in the Word, the Bible, then certain things that we experience become clearer. For example, if I have read the story of Joseph and know about Potiphar's wife seducing him, then I would be more prepared to resist sexual temptation. A continual awareness of God's commands should make it easier to spot sin when we see it. So, if we hear the voice of temptation, we can clearly label that temptation and not suppose that it comes from God. God will never call us to sin. These are the easier discernment cases.
2. The harder cases are when we have to choose between two "goods." When I was in seminary, I really thought about joining the (Eastern) NC Conference. (which is from Burlington to the coast. Our conference is from Greensboro to the Tennessee line). As a surfer, I liked the idea of being closer to the coast. And I thought, what difference does it make where I serve the Lord as long as I serve Him? But I wanted to do God's will. So, I:
a. Prayed, prayed, prayed. And still no definitive answer.
b. I asked a few close, trusted spiritual friends to pray with me for a time and then tell me what they thought. They had no definitive answer.
c. I "tried on" the decision to move to the Eastern Conference. I even pursued it. I went and interviewed with a district in that conference and was approved to go. BUT, I HAD NO PEACE ABOUT IT. I couldn't explain it, but it just did not feel right. So, thankfully, I listened to that non-peace and took that as God's Spirit leading me, and I am so glad I did! Now, years later, I see countless, countless reasons why God wanted me to stay in this conference (not the least of which was to serve the churches I have served and serve currently and serve Jesus with so many great saints). My desire to move East was not God speaking by my own selfish desire.
So, what I am saying is when you are trying to discern if something is God speaking or just yourself:
1. Pray, pray, pray. Many times, God will work through our own spirit and mind to help us make decisions.
and/or
2. Ask some trusted, mature, spiritual friends to pray about it and see what God reveals to them
and/or
3. "Try on" a certain decision before it has to be final for a few days, week, etc. and see if God gives you peace about the decision or not peace.
May God bless you as you follow Jesus!